Why Do Our Kids Love Fortnite So Much?
A deep dive to get to the bottom of it!
I have not had much experience with gaming.
The only memory I have of gaming as a child was when one of my sisters played Mario Brothers. I remember the sounds and the odd mushrooms.
I am practical and have always wondered how this digital world is important. What difference does it make in the real world? I don’t understand the point of it and I’m sure there are other parents who can relate.
However, I do understand that this is important to our children. Below, I unpack some of the ways in which it is important to them.
The list is long. It makes me realize how I need to listen even when I don’t understand — more in fact!
1. Belonging and building community
During the teenage years, developing an identity independent of the family is so important. Family as a community is no longer enough. A recent study notes that belonging to more than one group or community is beneficial for the mental health of adolescents.
This makes complete sense to me. Teens need to build relationships and community — both online and in-person to develop their identity. It’s at this point that being a crack Fortnite gamer, a math whiz, a rugby fanatic, a serious pianist, a pop music aficionado, or a Pokémon trader among many other things is key.
Finding others with the same interests is also important. Some of these relationships and communities may fall away over time. Others will intensify as a sense of self and relationship is better developed and understood.
2. International borders, international connection
The communities that we had access to when we were growing up were localized. Now, young people have access to communities that cross borders.
Our children for example game with their friends from when we lived in France. They catch up with each other by playing a game online and chatting too. I love that they can keep in contact without having to go through us.
3. Socialising without pressure
Have you noticed how boys, in particular, can find it easier to chat when they are engaged in an activity? It might be playing games or fishing or throwing a rugby ball. They can converse and share and it’s far less likely to feel overwhelming.
Sitting across from someone puts a lot of pressure to hold eye contact and “have a conversation”.
If you’re struggling to converse with your teen, try doing something together (you could even try gaming!) and see what questions or topics of conversation come up naturally.
4. Supporting friends
Earlier this year, one of our boy’s gaming friends moved to Germany. They all still play together, and the entire team of children was so supportive.
I remember the commentary the day that they moved: “They’ll be on the plane now,” and “I wonder how their new school is going.” I was moved by the empathy, the care, and the shared experience.
5. Teaching others
I’ve also noticed that a good deal of advice and skill-sharing takes place. The boys love to find out something and then share the tip with a friend.
This capacity to learn and teach others seems to come naturally when it’s something they are interested in. What a skill to develop young! You know the Richard Feynman quote, right? “If you want to master something, teach it.”
6. International awareness
Now, my earlier comment about not understanding how games have relevance in the real world is thrown into question by how Epic Games responded to the war in Ukraine: “Epic is committing all its Fortnite proceeds from March 20, 2022 through April 3, 2022 to humanitarian relief for people affected by the war in Ukraine.”
The real-world impact was massive. You can read more about it here: https://bit.ly/FortniteUkraineRelief
What’s more, it brought greater awareness to our young people. They felt part of something much larger than themselves and made a positive contribution. I value how they were able to bring something to the conversation.
7. A sense of achievement
On a personal level, everyone loves to win and there’s a real sense of achievement that comes from gaming.
On the flip side, there is also frustration when things don’t go according to plan. I have seen both in our home which brings us to emotional regulation!
8. Emotional regulation
In a youth survey, “two-thirds (62%) of boys and 44% of girls who played electronic games somewhat or strongly agreed that they sometimes used games to help them relax; substantial numbers also used games to cope with anger (45% of boys and 29% of girls). Forgetting problems and coping with loneliness were also cited as reasons for play.”
Emotional regulation is a big topic when it comes to gaming. Emotions are often drivers for starting to play a game and then, for stopping play too. It’s a topic to delve into another day, perhaps!
9. New tech and making sense of this crazy world
When I look at Fortnite, I see a world that is both futuristic and retro in a way I can’t quite articulate. Perhaps the retro element for me is the battle bus. At any rate, all the game modes have elements of climate disaster. One is even called, Fortnite: Save the World.
It feels very relevant and one way for our teens to gamify and somehow process a very serious, worldwide reality — and the kids are in it together and also, pitted against each other Hunger Games style. It’s a lot, but the more I delve into it, the more I can see the sense in it.
What’s the takeaway?
Don’t be too hard on your kids when it comes to Fortnite and gaming in general. If they are doing what they need to do, let them have their thing.
Either it’s something that they will grow out of in time or, it might be the start of their career as a game developer or an NFT designer or a tech specialist of some sort that has not even been dreamed up yet.
In the meantime, they are getting a lot out of it.
Focus on the benefits as best you can and keep asking those questions.
Some jargon to help you out:
Skins: these are the different looks a player can take on.
Sweaty: this means that the skin is awesome. The boys often choose more female-inspired skins because they are slimmer and more difficult to hit! (There’s one way to address gender issues and make female characteristics more valued right there!)
FPS: First-person shooter
TPS: Third-person shooter
OG player: original gangster (I have never heard the children use this in full, but they know it to mean someone who is “cracked” at the game. They also use it for those who are first to do something as in “OG player” or “original player”.)
Cracked: My boys use this to mean that someone is brilliant at the game.
V-bucks: the in-game currency that you buy with real currency to buy a battle pass for a Fortnite Battle Royale season or to buy a new “skin”.
The backstory
Fortnite came out in July 2017 when we were living in Copenhagen. I remember going outdoors and having random kids come up to us and say “Fortnite?” I was clueless and I’m not sure whether the boys (then 6 and 8) knew what was going on either. At the time, the boys were interested in gaming and had access to Minecraft and some PS3 two-player games.
Fortnite, however, was only added to their gaming repertoire when they were aged 10 and 12. I had been worried about several elements — it’s a shooter game for one and, many parents talked about how their children had become addicts almost overnight. Despite this, my persuasive children (and their Dad!) were soon downloading the much-anticipated game.
