Is there anything as compelling as gaming?

Five ideas to entice your children from their screens. They will thank you!

It can be difficult to find activities more compelling than video games… Our young people love their games and in these strange times, we all need a certain amount of distraction and relaxation. I’m happy they get so much out of a video game!

That being said, it is awesome to have a few go-to activities that do not involve a screen. It’s also great to find activities that the whole family can enjoy. Below, I share what works in our home with our boys, aged 10 and 12.

Competition

Competition is a thing in our household. Sometimes, I find myself trying to diminish it (unsuccessfully) or bring some awareness to it. I might say: “We’re on the SAME team!” or “What makes you feel you need to compete with your brother/ your friend/ your team-mate/…” — you get the picture.

Other times, I just embrace it wholeheartedly. This is exactly what we did when we started our Masterchef competition. The first time we tried this, each of our boys invited a friend and teamed up with them to compete for the Masterchef title.

I prepared the “mystery box” containing the same ingredients for both teams. The instructions were to create a small main meal and a small desert for everyone. This worked out well as all involved wanted to try out the other team’s meal and, enjoy their own too. It also worked out well because dinner was prepared for us. That’s a win-win situation for sure!

Since then, we have tried different Masterchef challenges which you can read about here. Each one has been a fun evening. We put on some music, make sure everyone knows the rules, enjoy the process and the delicious outcome too.

Play dates with friends

When our children were younger, I felt I needed to micro-manage play dates. I made sure kiddies were safe, well-fed, watered, plastered in sun screen or wearing a jersey! You know — all the things that mums of little people tend to do.

Now that the boys are older, play dates have taken on a completely different tone. I’m not needed at all! In fact, all I need do is state when gaming is a potential (they usually take the opportunity) and what time dinner is. The boys love to play on the PlayStation with friends, but they’re equally happy kicking a football or cycling outdoors.

It’s quite magical to see how children value relationship. In these strange times, I hope that we can help our children nurture friendships. Studies have shown again and again how important friendships are for developing inter-personal skills.

We learn how to communicate — how to start a conversation, how to listen, how to interpret the context, body language, facial expressions, how to interact positively, how to resolve differences — there sure is a wealth of learning in all our different interactions. In teenage years especially, the research points to how friendships help shape belonging and identity as well as helping to reduce stress.

“Friendship is the hardest thing in the world to explain. It’s not something you learn in school. But if you haven’t learned the meaning of friendship, you really haven’t learned anything.” — Muhammad Ali

Sports

Now that the boys are that bit older, they’re keen to learn all sorts of sports. Rugby and cricket, tennis and squash — you name it — they’d like to give it a bash! There’s an element of competition and an element of constantly improving themselves. They understand that the more they practise, the better they become. They also recognise that they need to develop their skills to build competence and confidence.

In some ways, the COVID-19 pandemic and reduced access to sport has brought sport to the fore in our home. There was so much excitement when we could finally access a swimming lesson! At school, the children still can’t play team sports matches against other schools, but the children are taking their practising and conditioning very seriously!

You!

Spending time with you. This one goes without saying, but it’s the one we tend to forget when we’re tired. Just being together as a family, without any distractions, is magical. Dinner time together. An evening listening to music and dancing. Games night… They’re all such simple ways to enjoy each other’s company.

Outdoor spaces

Just a few years ago, our youngest would complain about walking long distances and although we walked the French countryside and even spent a summer holiday hiking in the Pyrenees mountains, it’s only recently, that he has stopped complaining. He has stopped asking how long until the end of the hike. It’s quite something!

He has started enjoying the hikes. Pop a trail mix into his pocket, invite a friend or two, explain the destination and voila, no complaints!

The best place we have hiked so far, is the Drakensberg mountains in South Africa. Invariably, your destination is a waterfall with beautiful, fresh, crystal clear water and you can take a dip. What a pleasure. Finding magical, natural places during these times is truly special.

Another recently discovered adventure is a trip to a dam. A few of our friends have a boat and take the boys tubing or skiing. This is the ultimate thing for our youngest. He’s even been known to say that a boat is all you need in life! Splash in the water. Canoe or paddle ski. Fish if that’s allowed. Picnic or if you’re in South Africa, braai. It makes for such a simple, connected, prefect day.

In the past, we have lived in large cities where access to wild spaces is less possible, but even a park or any kind of green, makes a difference. Spend time there with your children. It does the world of good.

So, there you have it! Some things are as compelling as games!