Can You Imagine Not Talking for 5 Days? How about 10? Welcome to Vipassana!
An insight into Vipassana at the Buddhist Retreat Center
Vipassana is a meditation practice that is carried out in silence over a period of days usually at a retreat center to better understand yourself. Vipassana means to “see things as they really are.” These retreats have become increasingly popular as various celebrities have talked about their experiences and the insights they have gained.
While I am interested in meditation and retreats, I can’t say I would have tried Vipassana had it not been for a qualification I was studying towards. My intention was to teach mindfulness to children and part of the learning process is a 5-day Vipassana retreat. So, always open to new and interesting experiences, I made my way to the Buddhist Retreat Centre in Ixopo, South Africa early last year.
I found my way to my room more by chance than by design as it was tipping down with rain at the time and I couldn’t see anything! The Buddhist Retreat Centre in Ixopo feels like it is at the end of the world especially when you arrive in torrential rain!
Mindfully created, the various structures for accommodation, dining, and meditation, overlook valleys and forests and blend into the natural environment. Nature takes center stage here — the weather, the plants, the trees, bird life, and even the monkeys.
Perhaps it is the quality of being mindful that heightens the experience of nature. Everything is felt, heard, seen, and experienced more fully. While this may sound like a good thing, it’s also intense!
Heightened senses
In the quiet of the meditation hall, I found that sounds were so much louder than they had ever been before including the sound of my own breathing. I heard each step too and my sense of touch was heightened. If there’s one piece of advice I’d give to someone preparing for a Vipassana retreat, I’d say to pack your most comfortable, loose clothing. If you are wearing something that is ever so slightly too tight or too textured, too heavy or too light, you feel it. You feel it for a long time!
When heightened senses are wonderful!
Food at the Buddhist Retreat Centre is organic, wholesome, vegetarian fare and the center is well-known for its delicious meals. You can even invest in one of their vegetarian cookbooks. It’s pure comfort food to feed the soul and you need it when you’re doing a Vipassana retreat!
Sitting down to a meal in silence feels strange at first, but eating soon becomes a beautiful, focused ritual rather than a distraction. Not only do you engage all your senses, but you also end up eating what you need and appreciating it much more. Knowing that the beautiful produce comes from the vegetable gardens on-site makes everything feel complete.
While it might sound ever so simple, my favorite moment was when I would find my morning toast — tucked into a basket and nestled in a crisp, clean napkin — and unwrap it to find still-warm, homemade toast. It smells and tastes delicious!
What of the meditation itself?
At first, we learned the sitting and walking meditation rounds. I’d like to say it felt completely zen, but I’ll admit that it didn’t. We were in the meditation hall by 5 am and went to bed at 10 pm. Besides mealtimes and a moment in the afternoon for a walk, we did our rounds — round after round. The idea is to name the emotion that comes up for you and repeat it three times — silently of course. If you can name an emotion and acknowledge that emotion, you’ll notice that it will pass. While this practice sounds incredibly simple, it is incredibly hard. At some moments, it felt like a punishment.
Traditionally, Vipassana retreats are longer than 5 days. Many are 10-day retreats and more are 30-day retreats. I found such benefit in the 5-day retreat and I can see how the 10-day retreat could offer even more. That said, as a first-timer, I’m relieved to have done the shorter version.
Would I do it again?
Some Vipassana practitioners come back year after year for their fill. I can understand why. It certainly brings clarity. When I arrived back home and normality set in, I was amazed by how quickly some habits crept back in. It’s not easy to hold yourself to some well-intentioned ideals. Well, I don’t find it easy! The good/bad/interesting thing is that I am now aware of my patterns and can recognize them as such. It is up to me to choose whether to repeat them or change them.
This year, my eldest starts high school so I have a good reason not to attend. I am making an excuse — I am fully aware of that! It is a good one! Really though, the retreat was tough. I’m glad I went. I know I should go again. I can see that each time, the experience would be different and that I would learn more. Perhaps next year…
What surprised me about the retreat?
The first thing that surprised me was how much I enjoyed not having to talk to everyone, not having to be polite and find out about everyone and make sure that they are all okay. I guess we all tend to have patterns around how we behave in a group and I tend to take on the caring role. If there is someone who looks lost or who needs a drink, I’ll be the one to help. It was valuable to see that behavior as a role that I choose and have the freedom not to choose it.
It was such a weight off my shoulders to just look after myself and let everyone else look after themselves. I have tried to take this into my day-to-day. I try to be more mindful and notice when I am doing too much and am on the verge of then feeling resentful. I try to communicate this to my family. They’re used to me doing what I do of course so, it’s important for me to communicate with them. I find that opening the discussion is valuable so we can all start to see the roles that we play — consciously or unconsciously. If we’re aware of our patterns, we can then choose to perpetuate them — or not.
Distractions and being alone to know who you are
The other thing that I noticed was how much distraction is everywhere and how I use it to procrastinate or avoid difficult moments. I am trying to be more mindful of this, but it is a tough one — for most of us perhaps. After all, it’s much easier to binge-watch a Netflix series or lose yourself in a fantasy novel than complete some important work or have a meaningful conversation. There are times when my days are filled with so much noise that I need to choose to disconnect and reset. As Charlotte Eriksson so eloquently says: “Sometimes you need to sit lonely on the floor in a quiet room to hear your voice and not let it drown in the noise of others.”
Look at the shadows…
Finally, there was a comment from one of the trainers that surprised me when I explained why I was there and how I wanted to teach a system for mindfulness to children. (You can book a time to talk to the trainers once a day if you need to.)
She said: “If you are working with children, you’ll need to look at the shadow side.” At first, I did not quite know what to make of that. I had wanted to teach children mindfulness to help them to deal with our crazy world; to find light. I do tend to look on the bright side and it was helpful to be able to let that go — even for a moment — and acknowledge when something is just plain terrible or sad or unfair. It was liberating to give myself permission to be more honest about the negative.
On the last day, we spoke for the first time as a group and went around the circle and shared our names and anything we wanted to share. I was intrigued to see how many were there to find a certain freedom — some from physical pain, some from tangible addictions, some from things they have done in their past. I was awed and moved by the brave and courageous people I’d spent this time with; everyone on their own journey.
Vipassana and other courses at the BRC
Listed by CNN as one of the finest meditation centers in the world, the Buddhist Retreat Centre offers a 5- and 10-day Vipassana retreat at the start of every year. The retreat is run by Jonathan Preboy and Anna Scharfenberg who teach and manage the Tisarana Vipassananusorn Meditation Centre in Prague during the rest of the year.
While it may be too late to join the 2023 group, the BRC offers other courses throughout the year from meditation and yoga to family retreats and guided birding weekends. Considering that the BRC is home to 160 bird species including the endangered Blue Swallow and is focused on indigenous biodiversity, no doubt you’ll enjoy the nature there too regardless of which course you choose. The setting is truly magical.
Vipassana-wise, if you’re looking for an experience and a better understanding of yourself, you could consider going along next year. It’s not an easy thing to do, but it is worth the insights gained.
A few more things…
The Academy for Mindful Teaching is a good place to start if you’re interested in mindfulness for children: https://www.elinesnel.com/en/
If you would like to find a trainer for children, check out their comprehensive, worldwide list here: https://www.elinesnel.com/en/find-a-trainer/
